Penis Golf Putters: The Ultimate Guide (2024)

Golf’s traditions meet unexpected humor with the penis golf putter. This novelty item, shaped like male genitalia, is turning heads and sparking conversations on the green. But is this penis putter just a gag gift, or does it actually have some game? This post explores the world of penis golf putters, from design and popularity to golfer reviews and the ongoing debate surrounding their use. We’ll even touch on penis putters and grips. Let’s explore this eyebrow-raising trend.

Key Takeaways

  • Penis putters add a unique, humorous element to golf. They’re conversation starters and can make memorable gifts. Just remember, the novelty aspect shouldn’t overshadow practicality and course regulations.
  • Consider your playing style when choosing any putter, novelty included. Weight, length, and head design impact performance. Research materials and user reviews to find one that complements your putting stroke.
  • Be mindful of your playing environment. A penis putter might be hilarious among friends, but inappropriate for a company outing or formal tournament. Always check course regulations and be sensitive to your fellow golfers.

Understanding Golf Putter Regulations and Options

USGA Rules on Putter Grips: Size, Shape, and Number

Before we dive into the novelty of penis putters, let’s cover the basics of putter regulations. The USGA provides guidelines on putter grips, emphasizing their function in providing a firm hold during your stroke. While adding a grip isn’t mandatory, if you choose to use one, it must be at least 7 inches long. The USGA allows for variations in grip shapes, as long as the shape remains relatively consistent along the entire length. This offers some flexibility for golfers to personalize their grip. However, extremely unconventional shapes might raise eyebrows (or even violate regulations). So, while a penis-shaped grip *might* be permissible if it meets the length and consistency requirements, it’s always best to check with local course rules before teeing off with something so unusual.

Putter Length and Your Height

Finding the right putter length is crucial for a consistent putting stroke. Resources like this helpful article from GearsSports offer guidance on selecting a putter length based on your height. Generally, taller golfers prefer longer putters, and shorter golfers prefer shorter ones. However, personal preference also plays a significant role. Experimenting with different lengths can help you find what feels most comfortable and promotes a smooth, controlled putting motion. This holds true regardless of the putter head design—even for novelty putters, the right length is essential for solid performance.

Odyssey Putters: Performance and Rewards

For those seeking a more traditional putter, Odyssey is a popular choice. Known as the #1 putter on tour, Odyssey offers a wide selection of putters designed for various playing styles. Their White Hot OG and Stroke Lab putters are known for their innovative designs and performance-enhancing features. Callaway Rewards members enjoy perks like free shipping, returns, a 30-day performance guarantee, and a 2-year warranty. While Odyssey doesn’t currently offer a penis putter (that I know of!), their extensive selection ensures you can find a high-quality putter that suits your game.

Golf Terminology for Enthusiasts

Common Golf Terms and Definitions

Golf has its own language. Understanding the terminology can enhance your appreciation of the game. The term “putter” simply refers to the club used on the green. While the shape and design of putters can vary widely, from traditional blades to mallet-style heads (and even to more unconventional shapes), their fundamental purpose remains the same: to roll the ball into the hole. So, whether you’re wielding a classic Odyssey or a novelty putter, mastering putting is key to a better score.

What Are Penis Putters?

What Are Penis Putters Used For?

A penis putter is exactly what it sounds like: a golf putter shaped like a penis. The club head—the part that strikes the golf ball—mimics male genitalia. While the novelty is undeniable, these putters are, surprisingly, designed for actual gameplay. Some golfers claim the unique head shape improves alignment or simply adds a bit of fun to their game. Others buy them as gag gifts or conversation starters. Whatever the reason, penis putters have carved their own niche in the golf world.

How Do Penis Putters Differ from Traditional Putters?

While the head shape is the most obvious difference, penis putters can vary in other ways from traditional putters. Standard putters come in various forms, from classic blade putters favored for their traditional look and feel to milled putters crafted from a single block of metal (like stainless steel) and insert putters designed with softer faces for a different feel at impact. Traditional putters also adhere to standard lengths (typically 33–35 inches for men) and weights (usually between 330 and 350 grams). Penis putters, however, may deviate from these norms. Their materials, weight, and length can differ depending on the manufacturer. While some manufacturers might prioritize functionality and adhere to standard putter specifications, others might lean into the novelty and produce putters outside the typical range. This can impact performance, so it’s something to consider when choosing a penis putter.

Best Penis Putter Brands

Looking for a putter that’s sure to turn heads on the green? Novelty putters offer a fun and unique way to express yourself on the course. Here are a few brands and models that stand out:

Golf Gods: The Big Dick Putter

Golf Gods has carved out a niche with its irreverent and humorous approach to golf gear. Their aptly named Big Dick Putter is a prime example. Retailing for $99, this stainless steel putter comes in a standard 34-inch length with a 350-gram head weight. It’s not just a novelty item; the putter is designed for functionality, too. The purchase includes a “Fuck Bogeys” putter cover, and Golf Gods offers a 60-day money-back guarantee and free shipping on orders over $60. If you’re looking for a conversation starter on the green, this putter might be just what you need. See the Big Dick Putter on the Golf Gods website.

Stroker’s Club: The Original Big Dick Putter

The Stroker’s Club also offers its own take on the novelty putter with The Original Big Dick Putter. Marketed as a gag gift or tournament prize, this putter is available in 33, 34, and 35-inch lengths. Crafted from stainless steel with a 350-gram head weight, it’s currently on sale for $169.00, down from its original price of $229.00. Learn more at The Stroker’s Club website.

Other Penis Putter Options

Beyond these two prominent brands, other options cater to the novelty putter market. The Peter Putter, for example, is marketed as a fun and unique gift. With an aluminum head and a professional-quality design, it offers a balance of novelty and performance. Pricing starts at $54.99, making it a more budget-friendly option. Explore the Peter Putter for more details. These novelty putters offer a fun way to personalize your golf game and add a bit of humor to your round.

Unique Putter Grips and Materials

While the head of the putter often gets the most attention, the grip plays a crucial role in your putting performance. It’s the only point of contact you have with the club, so finding one that feels comfortable and promotes a consistent stroke is essential. And, just like with putter heads, there are options beyond the standard rubber grips. Let’s explore a couple of intriguing choices.

SuperStroke SuperShvantz Putter Grip

Looking to add a touch of humor to your game? The SuperStroke SuperShvantz putter grip might be just the ticket. Yes, you read that right. This grip offers a unique, conversation-starting design while still providing the comfort and control needed for a solid putting stroke. While its novelty is undeniable, the SuperShvantz is designed to enhance feel and improve your connection with the putter. It’s a fun way to personalize your clubs and inject some levity into your round. It blends humor with performance, making it a fun addition to any golfer’s collection.

Putters Made from Bull/Buffalo Reproductive Organs (Ross Taylor Originals)

For those seeking truly unique golf equipment, Ross Taylor Originals offers putters crafted from bull and buffalo reproductive organs. This isn’t just a gimmick; these putters are designed for durability and longevity. A 5/16″ steel rod runs the length of the putter for added strength and stability. They also offer customization options, allowing you to match the dimensions of your current putter to ensure a seamless transition. It’s a blend of novelty and functionality that’s sure to make a statement on the course. If you’re looking for a putter that’s as unique as your swing, this might be the perfect fit. It’s definitely a conversation starter.

Penis Putter Features and Specs

Penis Putter Materials and Construction

Putter construction plays a vital role in performance, and understanding the materials used can help you choose the right club. Many modern putters, like insert putters, feature a specially designed insert in the clubface. These inserts, often made from polymer, aluminum, elastomer, or other soft materials, create a softer impact feel compared to traditional metal faces. The specific material influences the feel and responsiveness of your putts. For example, polymer is known for providing a soft, responsive feel, contributing to better control and distance management on the green. Knowing the materials used in your putter can help you fine-tune your putting stroke.

Penis Putter Size and Weight

Finding the right putter size and weight is crucial for a consistent putting stroke. Putter weights typically range from 300 to 400 grams, with the sweet spot often falling between 330 and 350 grams. This range provides a balance of control and feel, allowing for smooth, accurate strokes. Similarly, putter length is a key factor. Standard putter lengths for men typically hover around 33–35 inches, while women’s putters are generally between 33 and 34 inches. These measurements, as discussed in Callaway Golf’s guide, serve as a good starting point, but it’s always best to get fitted to ensure the putter aligns perfectly with your stance and posture.

Penis Putter Grip Types

Grip type and design significantly impact your putting performance. While traditional blade-style putters can be quite technical, mallet putters are often recommended for beginners due to their larger sweet spot and inherent stability. The heavier feel and weight distribution of mallet putters help maintain balance throughout your stroke, promoting a more consistent putting motion. This added stability, as discussed on The Golfing Pros website, can be particularly beneficial for golfers who struggle with keeping the clubface square at impact. Choosing the right grip type and design can improve your overall putting accuracy and confidence.

DIY Penis Putter Grip Options

Want to add a personal touch to your penis putter? DIY modifications can be a fun way to enhance the novelty. A popular suggestion from the golfing community is modifying a standard dildo to fit the putter shaft. This allows for customization—think size, color, texture—and ensures a comfortable, functional grip. One Reddit user even shared detailed instructions on this process.

Prefer to buy rather than build? Etsy offers unique, often handmade, penis putter grips. This is a great way to support small businesses and find a truly distinctive grip.

DIY or pre-made, the key is finding a grip that complements your playing style and adds a touch of humor. Consider the grip’s size and texture for a comfortable, secure hold, as this can impact your putting. And, remember to be mindful of course regulations and your fellow golfers’ comfort levels when using a novelty item.

Penis Putter Performance and Quality

When it comes to putters, performance and quality are key. Whether you’re sinking a crucial putt for birdie or just trying to avoid three-putting, the right putter can make all the difference. This section explores the performance and quality aspects of novelty putters, looking at accuracy, consistency, feel, and durability.

Accuracy and Control with a Penis Putter

Accuracy and control are essential for any putter. While the unusual design of a novelty putter might seem distracting, many golfers find that the unique head shape and weight distribution actually improve their aim and control. Similar to how mallet putters offer enhanced stability, some novelty putters can provide a similar advantage. Check out these Odyssey Stroke Lab putters to see how technology can improve stability and accuracy. Ultimately, a putter’s impact on accuracy depends on your putting stroke and preferences.

Consistency and Feel of Penis Putters

Consistency and feel are subjective, but crucial for putting performance. A putter with consistent feedback and a comfortable feel can greatly improve a golfer’s confidence. Some golfers report that novelty putters, with their unique design and weight distribution, contribute to a more consistent stroke and a solid feel at impact. Reviews of L.A.B. Putters highlight the importance of feel and feedback. While a novelty putter’s design might prioritize novelty, the feel at impact is still a critical factor. This Golf Digest guide emphasizes the importance of face feel, even in technologically advanced putters.

Penis Putter Durability

Durability matters for any golf club. You want a putter that can withstand regular use and the occasional bump in your bag. Proper care is essential for maintaining a putter’s performance and lifespan. Golfers Authority suggests that golf clubs can last for over a decade with proper maintenance. Check out The Brassie’s tips on putter care, including cleaning and storage. Simple maintenance practices will keep your novelty putter in good condition for years.

Why Choose a Penis Putter?

Let’s face it, golf can be a serious game. But sometimes, a little levity on the green is exactly what’s needed. That’s where penis putters come in. These unconventional clubs are turning heads and sparking conversations, adding a touch of humor to a traditionally buttoned-up sport. Beyond the novelty, there are several reasons why golfers are adding these putters to their bags.

Novelty and Function: Penis Putters

The most obvious draw is the sheer novelty. A putter shaped like a penis is undeniably a conversation starter. Brands like Golf Gods lean into this with product names like “The Big Dick Putter,” appealing to golfers who appreciate irreverence. But it’s not just about laughs. Some golfers believe the unique shape and weight distribution can improve their putting. As The Stroker’s Club suggests, their “Original Big Dick Putter” might be just what a golfer needs to improve their game. Whether it’s a placebo effect or a genuine performance enhancer, the unconventional design can add an element of fun and confidence on the green.

Penis Putters as Gifts

Penis putters have also become a popular gag gift. Looking for something unique for the golfer who has everything? A Peter Putter makes a memorable present for birthdays, holidays, retirements, or graduations. The Stroker’s Club also positions their Big Dick Putter as an ideal prize for golf tournaments or a fun gift for any golf enthusiast. It’s a way to inject some humor into the gift-giving occasion and provide a present that won’t be forgotten.

Penis Putters and Social Media

The rise of penis putters also coincides with their growing popularity on social media. Platforms like TikTok and Instagram are filled with videos and photos of golfers showing off their unique putters, contributing to a viral trend. Prime Putters notes the increasing search interest in “Peter Putter” over the past year, demonstrating how social media can drive interest and sales for these unconventional golf accessories. This online buzz creates a sense of community and encourages others to join the fun, further solidifying the penis putter’s place in the golfing world.

Penis Putter Reviews

So, what are golfers saying about these unconventional putters? It’s a mixed bag, with strong reactions on both sides. Let’s break down the feedback.

The Fun Side of Penis Putters

Many golfers are drawn to the sheer novelty and humor of penis putters. Brands like Golf Gods lean into this with provocative names and slogans. For some, this resonates. The Stroker’s Club positions its putter as “the perfect tournament prize or gift,” suggesting a lighthearted approach. They’re conversation starters, and can inject some levity into a sometimes overly serious game.

Common Penis Putter Complaints

However, the novelty can be a double-edged sword. Some customer reviews express concern that the joke overshadows the putter’s performance. Practicality is another issue. Prime Putters notes that putters like the “Peter Putter” are generally not legal for tournament play. So, while fun for a casual round, they might not be suitable for competition.

User Satisfaction with Penis Putters

Despite the mixed reviews, there’s a surprisingly decent level of satisfaction. Amazon reviews for the Golf Gods putter show a generally positive reception. While it’s tough to compare these to performance reviews of, say, Odyssey Stroke Lab putters, the positive feedback suggests that for many, the fun factor outweighs any performance drawbacks. Ultimately, user satisfaction depends on individual expectations and whether the buyer is prioritizing novelty or serious gameplay.

Where to Buy Penis Putters

So, you’re ready to add a bit of cheeky fun to your golf bag? This section breaks down the costs, deals, and purchasing options for penis putters.

Etsy

Etsy has become a great resource for finding unique and often quirky items, and penis putters have found a home there. You can find a range of options, from simple putter grips to fully customized clubs. One example is a “dick putter grip” listing, highlighting the playful nature of these products. This listing, and others like it, demonstrate how Etsy sellers cater to golfers looking to add a touch of humor to their game. The platform’s focus on handcrafted and personalized items allows for custom designs, making it a great place to find a penis putter that truly reflects your personality.

AliExpress

AliExpress offers a wider selection of penis putters, often at more competitive prices. You’ll find everything from basic models to more elaborate designs, with prices typically ranging from $3 to $175, depending on the materials and craftsmanship. While some are purely novelty items, others are marketed as functional golf clubs designed to enhance precision and comfort. AliExpress also frequently offers free shipping, making it a budget-friendly option for those curious about adding a penis putter to their golf bag.

Penis Putter Cost and Value

Like any golf equipment, penis putters range in price, and it’s important to weigh cost against what you’re getting. The Original Big Dick Putter, from The Stroker’s Club, typically costs $229.00, but keep an eye out—it’s often on sale for $169.00. At that price, you get a stainless steel shaft and a 350-gram head for a solid feel on the green. If you’re on a tighter budget, Golf Gods sells their Big Dick Putter in rose gold for $99, and it even comes with a free “Fuck Bogeys” putter cover.

Penis Putter Deals

Looking for a deal? Many retailers offer discounts and promotions. Golf Gods frequently has sales and offers free shipping on orders over $60. They also have giveaways—your purchase can earn you entries into a $5,000 contest. More purchases mean more chances to win.

Buying Penis Putters Online and In-Store

Getting your hands on one of these putters is pretty straightforward. Most brands, like The Stroker’s Club and Peter Putter, sell directly online, making it easy to buy one for yourself or as a gag gift. While less common, you might also find them in local golf or novelty shops.

Before You Buy a Penis Putter

Before you add a novelty putter to your bag, consider these important factors:

Choosing the Right Penis Putter for Your Game

Putter weight and length significantly impact your game. Most putters weigh between 330 and 350 grams, but the full range spans 300 to 400 grams. Finding the right weight for your stroke is key. A heavier putter can provide more stability, while a lighter putter might offer better feel. This article on putter weight offers a deeper dive into the topic. Length is also crucial; it directly affects your posture and alignment. Standard men’s putters measure around 33-35 inches, while women’s putters are typically 33-34 inches. Callaway Golf’s guide provides a comprehensive look at putter fitting and can help you determine the right length for your game. Consider how a novelty putter’s weight and length compare to your current putter and if it suits your putting style.

Penis Putters and Course Regulations

Novelty putters, particularly those with unconventional shapes, might not conform to regulations. For instance, the Peter Putter, with its distinct design, isn’t USGA legal. This restriction means you can’t use it in official tournaments or some casual rounds. Before purchasing a novelty putter, especially one with a unique shape, research its compliance with the rules of the courses where you play.

Penis Putters and Etiquette

Novelty putters, like those marketed as “Big Dick Putters,” often employ provocative humor. While some golfers appreciate this style, it can be offensive to others. Consider your golfing environment and playing partners. A penis-shaped putter might be a humorous gift among close friends, but it could be inappropriate for a company golf outing or a formal tournament. The marketing for these products often targets a specific audience, so consider whether it aligns with your personal style and the context of your rounds.

Penis Putter Care and Maintenance

Let’s be honest, a penis putter is an investment, not just in your game but also in comedic relief on the green. Proper care will ensure it stays in top shape, both functionally and aesthetically.

Cleaning and Storing Your Penis Putter

Just like any other club, your novelty putter needs regular cleaning. After each round, wipe the putter head to remove dirt, grass, and other debris. A damp cloth usually does the trick, but for stubborn grime, use a mild soap and water solution. Make sure to dry it thoroughly afterward to prevent rust, especially if it’s made of carbon steel, a tip recommended by The Brassie. When storing your putter, use a headcover to protect it from dings and scratches. Consider storing it separately from your other clubs to avoid any unintentional damage. Check out these additional pro tips from The Glen CC for cleaning and storing putters.

Keeping Your Penis Putter in Great Shape

The novelty of a penis putter is a big part of its appeal, so you’ll want to keep it looking its best. Avoid exposing it to extreme temperatures or harsh chemicals, which can damage the finish. Depending on your putter’s material—whether it’s steel, graphite, or polymer—specific care instructions may vary. Remember, while the novelty is fun, the putter’s primary function is to help you sink putts. Regularly check the grip for wear and tear and replace it if needed. If you notice any performance issues, like inconsistent roll or feel, consult a club professional for adjustments or repairs. Taking good care of your penis putter will ensure it remains a conversation starter and a reliable tool on the green for years to come.

The Future of Penis Putters

Penis Putter Trends

The golf equipment market, including niche products like penis putters, is experiencing significant growth. A recent report projects the golf putter market to grow to $2.5 billion by 2032, a compound annual growth rate of about 5.16%. This growth reflects a larger trend in golf where unique and innovative products are finding their audience. The overall golf club market is also expanding, projected to reach $6.64 billion by 2032, with a CAGR of 3.2%. This suggests a growing interest in diverse golf products, creating an opening for novelty items like penis putters.

Penis Putter Innovations

As the putter market evolves, design and performance remain crucial. Reviews emphasize the importance of balancing aesthetics with functionality, especially for niche products. For example, Golf Digest points out that some mallet putter designers can over-engineer features, sometimes at the expense of how the putter face feels at impact. This balance is a crucial consideration for penis putters, where the novelty aspect needs to deliver on the green. The increasing popularity of golf, fueled by economic growth and media exposure, suggests that innovative products like penis putters have a potential market. This rising popularity creates a favorable environment for unique golf products.

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Other Novelty Putters and Golf Accessories

While penis putters have certainly made a splash in the golfing world, they aren’t the only novelty putters and accessories available. Golf enthusiasts looking to add a bit of humor and personality to their game can explore a variety of unique options, some more outrageous than others. From quirky head covers to unconventional club designs, there’s a whole world of novelty golf gear out there.

One example is the Peter Putter, marketed as a fun and unique gift. With its aluminum head and a focus on quality design, it aims to balance novelty with performance. Starting at $54.99, the Peter Putter offers a playful twist while still being functional on the course. For those who enjoy a good chuckle on the green, it’s worth a look.

Another interesting option is the Big Dick Putter from Golf Gods. This stainless steel putter, priced at $99, isn’t just a conversation starter; it’s designed for actual gameplay with a standard 34-inch length and a 350-gram head weight. The included “Fuck Bogeys” putter cover adds to the humor, making it a perfect gift for the golfer with a, shall we say, *bold* sense of humor. You can find more unconventional and humorous golf accessories on the Golf Gods website.

For a more extravagant option, consider The Original Big Dick Putter from The Stroker’s Club, available in 33, 34, and 35-inch lengths. Crafted from stainless steel and weighing 350 grams, this putter is often marketed as a gag gift or a fun tournament prize. At $169.00 (down from $229.00), it’s a bit of an investment for a novelty item, but the reactions you’ll get on the course might just be priceless. For more discussions on unique golf gear, check out Sir Shanksalot’s article on laser-etched wedge faces.

These novelty putters reflect a growing trend in the golf equipment market, which is projected to reach $2.5 billion by 2032, with a compound annual growth rate of about 5.16% (Market Research Future). This growth shows increasing interest in unique and innovative golf products, creating space for more novelty items. So, whether you’re looking for a humorous gift or a way to express your personality on the green, the world of novelty golf accessories has something for everyone.

Frequently Asked Questions

Are penis putters legal in tournaments?

It depends on the specific putter and the tournament rules. Many novelty putters, especially those with unusual shapes, might not conform to USGA regulations. It’s always best to check the specific rules of any tournament you plan to enter before showing up with a novelty club. If you’re unsure, contact the tournament organizers directly.

Where can I buy a penis putter?

Most brands sell directly through their websites, making it easy to purchase online. You might also find them in some novelty shops or adult stores, but online retailers offer the widest selection.

Are penis putters actually any good for putting?

Honestly, it’s a mixed bag. Some golfers claim the unique head shape and weight distribution can actually improve their putting, while others find them more of a distraction. Ultimately, it comes down to personal preference and putting style.

What’s the typical price range for these putters?

Prices vary depending on the brand, materials, and features. You can find some for under $100, while others, especially those made with higher-quality materials, can cost upwards of $200. Keep an eye out for sales and discounts, which are often available.

Is it appropriate to use a penis putter everywhere?

Use your best judgment. While these putters can be a fun addition to a casual round with friends, they might not be suitable for every golfing environment. Consider your playing partners and the overall atmosphere of the course before bringing one along. A company golf outing or a formal tournament might not be the best place to showcase your novelty putter.